Flawless Imperfection.: February 2007

Hey everyone!

Chinese New Year holidays are over.
Hope everybody enjoyed theirs. I hadn't.
Hope everybody collected hundreds worth of Ang Pows. I hadn't.

Now we shall concentrate on the Common Tests which are less than a week away.

All the best to everyone!

The Madman™

Labels: CNY, Common Tests

Monday, February 12, 2007

Botak

Went skinhead today.

Figured I should try it while I'm still alive.

There's no school rule against that. As far as Yong Yue and I know.

I've got nothing to lose but hair. I ain't out to impress no one, and I got no dates on Valentine's.

So laugh all you want.

The Madman™

Labels: bald, botak, skinhead

Sunday, February 11, 2007

SQUEEZE

On Friday I was caught by our dear discipline mistress, Mrs. B. Lim, for wearing 'low socks' during the routine attire spotcheck in the morning.

She told me to pull the socks up higher.

I did.

Then she saw something she didn't like.

This:

'Branded socks'.

3 pairs for $5 Ayam Brand. 公鸡牌.

What's the reason for the school to disallow 'branded' items? Because it might influence others to buy them too, even though they may not have the means to afford to.

But socks? Hello-o?

Even if they were influenced to buy it, it only costs $1.67 a pair (cheaper than some all-white socks).

But nope. Apparently our school cannot see simple reasoning. Mrs. Lim asked me to buy a pair of 'proper socks' from Mr. Pudge Liu Gong Kia.

This.

For $2 - more expensive than my original one.

The irony of it all... And what's worse, is that it is 'branded' too, if I go by her definition.

As most can tell, from it's quality and material, it's only worth about $0.50.

Mr. Liu too is getting a golden tap in his toilet for Chinese New Year.

(Mr. Foo is getting one with the money earned from the sales of the 2007 Student Rulebook.)

After wearing it for one hour, the 'brand' has already started falling off.

Yay.

And what's best was that some bastard who was doing his 'cleaning duty' (god knows what they really do) after school threw them away. $2 down the fucking drain.

Tomorrow's Monday. And I have not gone to cut my hair. Looks like I'll have more good times with Bernadette.

* * *

Yeap Hooi Tong is another bastard.

He's our Chemistry rep.

We handed in our class work to him on Thursday (as instructed by Mrs. Siew) by putting it under his desk after school (as he rushes home immediately after school to have gay sex with Benjamin).

The next day during Chemistry lesson, Mrs. Siew asked for our assignments. We told her we handed it in to Hooi Tong. He denied having it.

Mrs. Siew asked Hooi Tong if it was under his desk.

He said no.

So she asked us to point out where we left our work.

I went over to Hooi Tong's table, reached under his desk, and LO AND BEHOLD! There they were.

Five or six pieces of assignment I pulled out, and he said there was nothing!

He didn't even fucking bothered to check if they were there or not.

What's worse is that he defended himself by claiming that we hid it under his desk.

Hello-o? We TOLD him it was under his desk. Mrs. Siew ASKED him if it was under his desk. He didn't even look for it and he dares to say we hid it.

And it was the only thing under his desk that morning, before he put his things over them.

What? Are we supposed to put it ON his table and let it be blown away by the wind or taken by someone?

Oh, and heard this out, he rushed home, again, for more gay sex with Benjamin that day, the second the school bell rang. Without collecting the work which was meant to be handed in, in Mrs. siew's own words, "by today".

GAY FAG.

The Madman™

Labels: B Lim, bastard, gay, Hooi Tong, Liu Gong Kai, pudge, socks

Thursday, February 08, 2007

Tired

I'm getting sick of life.

Everyday is the same ol', same ol'.

And it's not the same old fun stuff. It's the same old sickening stuff.

A typical day in our lives would consist of:

- Feeling depressed as we get out of bed;

- rushing off to school, boring lessons, bastard and bitch teachers targeting us;

- sitting for two or three tests which we never studied for;

- getting piled up with more homework (to be added to the already mountain-high pile of overdue homework);

- CCA till 7pm (all the while thinking about how the fuck you will be able to complete your homework or study for tests);

- reaching home at 8pm to have dinner (will probably be out of appetite), take a shower;

- do a little homework till around 10.30pm;

- worry about the shit that will come tomorrow, consider suicide;

- worry about the shit that will come the days to follow (tuition, piano lessons, AQ training, more tuition, Common Tests approaching...), consider suicide;

- worry about problems you have going on between your peers and family and yourself, consider suicide;

- think about things you can never change, think about the one you want to be with;

- say a silent prayer to the non-existant 'God' for strength to carry on...

- catch the few hours of 'sleep' we can get with eyes open...

...

We all lead meaningless lives.

We have only one lives. I know that. And I do try to make best of my time. But squeezing too much shit in without a break somewhere or another will just cause one to lose focus in life.

To feel stressed up.

A couple of years on Earth is given to most of us. Treasure it. Enjoy it.

You do not come to fucking work your ass off and die. There's no significance in that, and I bet nobody wants that either.

I am here on Earth. Life is given to me, like it or not. I will lead it my way and enjoy it.

I am not here to try to make a big difference on Earth. I am not here to satisfy you. I don't give a fucking damn what anyone says about me. I do not live my life to satisfy anyone. I am here to savour my life, my way. I can be broke and single but be happy, can't I?

What if I just die in a car crash tomorrow? Would doing my homework of the previous day help me anyway?

How many people come to my funeral, does that really matter? Dead people don't know no nuts. Even if i had made a great positive change to the world, say I discover an alternative source of energy, and be remembered by generations to follow, will I lead a meaningful life? Maybe I had just worked my whole fucking life away for it.

What matters is when I look back as my life flashes past, would I have regrets? Did I lead a happy, meaningful life?

I don't want to be famous, I don't need to be liked, I just want to be happy, and lead a carefree life.

Sorry, for typing so much junk here. Typical whining blog post of a Secondary 4 student, victim of the Singapore education system.

Or maybe it's just Nan Hua.

Maybe it's just me.

Tired.

The Madman™

Labels: life, stress, tired